Have You Ever...

Have you ever, ever felt like this? When strange things happen-

Okay, wait, that's the wrong blog start.

In our house, whenever someone says, "Have you ever-", either Andrew or I will break into that song that was at the start of that Australian children's programme with a lighthouse in it. It's a Law house meme.

But that's not what I'm here to talk about today.

Today, it's online grocery shopping. What's that? You'd rather I went back to that Australian children's programme, with the lighthouse in it? Fine. here you go. The rest of us are going to talk about groceries.

So, now we've got rid of them, shall we talk about my secret plans to make us all bajillions? No? Is that because you sense I have none and are just trying to steal yours? Well, perhaps. Back to groceries it is.

And it's now somewhat of an anti-climax.

But I'll crack on nonetheless. At the weekend I did my normal online grocery shop, but when it came I noticed that there were three packets of smoked mackerel instead of the one I had ordered. Three! And they were almost £4 each. Not being in the market for so much mackerel, I called the helpline. The conversation went thusly:

"Hello, I don't know if you can help, but I've just had my shopping delivered, and I seem to have 3 packets of smoked mackerel, but I only ordered 1."
"Well, let me just have a look at that for you [cue me giving my personal details about address/order number etc"
"Ah, madam, I see what you've done. When you selected mackerel, there's a drop down box where you can select kg, pounds, or each, and you've selected kg, instead of each. So instead of 1 packet, you've got 1 kg."
"Oh. I didn't mean to do that. I don't need 1kg of mackerel"
"It's quite a common mistake, actually. What I'll do is refund you the extra two packets, but just be aware of that next time."
"Thank you, that's very kind, considering it was my own mistake."
"No problem, anything else I can help you with etc etc./"

So there you go, have you ever ordered a kilo of smoked mackerel by mistake, and now have to work out what to do with it? Any suggestions?

And also, thank you to Waitrose for being the politest and most understanding supermarket I have ever encountered, even in the face of idiot customers ordering accidentally large amounts of smoked mackerel.